THE ART OF QUIET COMEBACKS: Part 14. The Voice of Your Scar

Part 14. The Voice of Your Scar

A series about starting over gently, honestly, and without apology

One major point from part 11 is the fact that true healing doesn’t erase the scar; it strengthens and helps you live with it. It helps you honor your scar; allowing your pain and its scar to shape you without defining you. It helps you forgive, and afterwards when your eyes behold the source of your pain or scar, your heart doesn’t ignite with anger, not even a tiny bit. That is true healing, in its most practical form.

Now that we have established the fact that true healing doesn’t erase the scar, what should we do with the scar? Hide it? Ignore it?

Before I answer the above question, first, let’s define a scar.

What is a scar?

Medically, a scar is a mark left on the skin or tissue after a wound, surgery or injury has healed. However, for the purpose of this series, we’ll be focusing on the symbolic meaning of a scar.

A scar is a proof of survival, the echo that healing has occurred. It is a memory, the visible or sometimes emotional reminder of past pain. A scar is a sign of transformation, the echo that something endured, changed and grew stronger. A scar can be seen as a metaphor for resilience, it doesn’t only speak about the pain, rather, it goes a long way to declare what healed. A scar is not the wound; it is the echo of recovery.

As significant as it is, never allow your scar to define who you are. It can shape you; it can make you more cautious, but it should never define your worth. The perspective from which you behold and portray your scar to the world is key, it can never be overemphasized. If you don’t behold your scar from the right perspective and hold onto it, the perspective of the world will engulf you and end up defining you.

Now, let’s answer the question asked earlier. A scar is a message; it shouldn’t be hidden. A scar is something that exists, don’t ignore it. However, you need to make your scar count; turn it into purpose. You have healed, turn it into a testimony. Don’t let your scar go idle, don’t waste it. Learn to use it for something meaningful. Use it to educate others, so they can avoid stepping into the same shoe that scarred your skin. Rise up, give your scar a voice, a voice full of positive purpose. If you don’t do that, the world will give it a negative purpose. They will name it and let it define you. Honor your scar by giving it a positive voice.

Navigate your experience into helping others. Help others avoid the ditch, and if they are already in it, let your scar be a testament to the fact that true healing exists. Let your testimony encourage and cheer them into genuine healing. Let them know that true healing is possible, it is attainable. However, don’t stop there, help them rise; higher and better.

I want you to know that you didn’t bleed for nothing. You didn’t break just to stay broken. You healed; you rose up. Therefore, make your scar count. Let it speak; let it shine and let its shining echo all over the world. Let your scar change something positively.

Have you heard about the Kintsugi Soul? Let’s say a few things about it.

The Kintsugi Soul

There is an ancient practice in Japan called Kintsugi. It means “Golden Joinery” in Japanese. It is the practice of repairing broken pottery with gold. Instead of hiding the cracks in the pottery, the artist will fill them with precious metals. The effect of this practice is that it makes the broken pottery become more beautiful, attractive to the eye far better than it was before. This practice infuses the brokenness as part of the story and ensures the scars become sacred.

The centuries-old technique uses urushi lacquer mixed with powdered gold, silver, or platinum. The urushi lacquer serves as the adhesive, and while the lacquer is still tacky, powdered gold, or silver, or platinum is dusted or pressed onto the surface, creating the iconic golden veins. This process doesn’t hide the wound, it doesn’t ignore the scar, instead, it pulls patience into the picture and crowns the scar with gold. That way, the break becomes a feature, a beauty to behold. This is far beyond repair, it’s redemption. When brokenness is transformed into brilliance.

Dear reader, can you give your scar a voice? A positive voice that will serve as Kintsugi, turning your scar into a part of a beautiful story for others to behold, admire and learn from. Once you give it that positive voice, ensure it doesn’t go silent. Let it speak about survival, the beauty born from brokenness. Never see your scar as a wound, it’s not. The wound has been healed, and your scar is wisdom. Let the voice of your scar tell the story of the beauty from a healed wound, the story of beauty in ashes.

Every scar should have a voice; however, the voice it ends up with is your choice to make. The world around you can give your scar a voice, but as the bearer of the scar, you should be the one to give a voice to your scar and let the world around you see it from the perspective of that voice.

Remember, JS Havilah cares about you, yes, you!

Part 15 of THE ART OF QUIET COMEBACKS is quietly on its way.

Come back for every installment.
Come back to remember you are not alone.
Come back, not to catch up, but to catch your breath.

Still becoming,

JS Havilah