THE ART OF QUIET COMEBACKS: Part 13. Must Every Broken Piece Be Gathered?

Part 13. Must Every Broken Piece Be Gathered?

A series about starting over gently, honestly, and without apology

Sometimes, life journeys through a path that makes it bend with excruciating pain. When caution is not pulled into the picture, it bends beyond its elastic limit, and eventually, it breaks. At that point, life becomes shattered pieces. You’re alive but broken into many pieces. Many times, the break isn’t gentle, neither is it polite. It shatters you into fragments you didn’t know existed. Fragments you never knew were part of you. When you find yourself in this situation, always remember you’re not alone, you’re not the first to break, and you won’t be the last. Life happens!

In previous parts/chapters of this series, a lot has been discussed, including the need to gather your broken pieces. In doing that, you don’t have to pick up everything all at once. It’s okay to go one at a time. However, one question keeps resonating: “Must every broken piece be gathered?” That is one question many people wrestle with, and that’s exactly what this part/chapter will address.

Beholding your broken pieces can be very painful. Some pieces scream, some go silent, and some bleed. At that moment, as you stare at your broken pieces, continents of pain flood your being, blending with several thoughts racing through your brain. You wonder: “Should I pick them all up?” I want you to know that it’s very possible that not every piece belongs.

There are fragments forged in truth, those fragments hold your story, your scars, and your strength. However, it’s possible that some fragments were shaped by lies, shame, fear, survival, or the drive to survive outside your purpose. Those fragments helped you endure, but they never helped you become.

Some fragments were shaped out of your quest to prove a point, forged within your drive to show the world that you’re also strong and can perform. Some fragments were shaped in your resilience while holding on to something that was never yours, something that was never meant to be yours. Some were forged in your dedication and desire of holding on to something or someone you ought to have let go.

Picking up every piece might mean carrying weights that were never meant to stay. You must comprehend the fact that some pieces will cut you again if you hold them too long. Some pieces will facilitate another breaking, not because they’re not good, but because they’re not good for you. Your makeup can’t accommodate them, even though they’re good. Picking up some pieces will make you a jack of all trade, master of none!

Sometimes, it’s necessary we break so we can behold the pieces we have ignorantly forged; pieces that were never meant to be a part of us. Breaking gives us the opportunity to realize our mistakes. It gives us the chance to behold where we missed it. Breaking presents to us the opportunity to retrace our steps or go through the same cycle that broke us. This is why when a person is broken, he or she is in a sacred moment of life.

You have walked through fire; you burned but you didn’t get burnt. The flame scorched you, it scared you, but it didn’t consume you. Now, you’re on a journey; you’re not surviving, you’re evolving. You’re not just becoming a better person; you’re becoming a new person. Therefore, you don’t need every fragment of your broken pieces to rebuild. You only need the ones that still speak truth. The ones that still pulse with your purpose. You only need the ones that whisper, “You’re becoming.”

You shouldn’t tread the path of restoring the old, rather, tread the path of forging the new. Therefore, to discover which piece to pick up and rebuild with, I need you to do something. Ask each piece the following questions:

•  Will this help me heal?
•  Will picking you up help me grow?
•  Does this honor who I’m supposed to become?

Be sure you’ve got the right analysis, the right answers. If you discover those pieces won’t be of help to who you’re supposed to become, then let them go. Every piece that does not resonate with your purpose should be left behind, no matter how good and powerful they may seem. Purpose differs; therefore, a powerful piece may be destructive to your purpose while it’s helpful to another.

Please, as you plod out of the fire, let every unnecessary piece fall back into the fire. It doesn’t matter what people think or say; as you plod out of the fire, let every step be a testament of your purpose.

I strongly want you to know that you’re not a puzzle to be reassembled. You’re a new creation; a mosaic made from chosen fragments. Some of those fragments may be smooth, but some may have rough edges. They don’t all have to be smooth, and you don’t have to have everything figured out. Just be intentional and trust the process. You are not what broke you. Instead, you’re whatever you chose to carry forward.

Remember, JS Havilah cares about you, yes, you!

Part 14 of THE ART OF QUIET COMEBACKS is quietly on its way.

Come back for every installment.
Come back to remember you are not alone.
Come back, not to catch up, but to catch your breath.

Still becoming,

JS Havilah